I have been really back and forth about when is the right time to post this. I have decided I am safe enough to post it now.
I am barefoot and pregnant.
I know you’re thinking, “Why the hell are you barefoot?” Let me explain. It is 140 degrees in this big, wonderful, beautiful house that we decided to buy when there was snow on the ground. When we bought the house, we knew it didn’t come with air. At first, being from Texas, I thought that was NUTS. Later found out, in this area, that is very common. The summers here just don’t get that hot, at least that was the lie the CT residents told us. Truth be told? It’s flippin’ hot. My pup, who is a big girl, is a hot mess. I went two weeks ago and got her shaved. She is a short haired dog, but in the summer, with her dark hair, I didn’t want that extra inch to make her more miserable. So I take her a few times during the summer to get her shaved. This is what she does all day...
So, if the dog is this hot, imagine a pregnant woman. Did I mention I am pregnant?
I am on my third surrogacy. I found this amazing couple in Boston. Actually, we found each other. After the last surrogacy, I decided to do just one more. Those of you that really know me, know I’ve said, “just one more time” about two surrogacies ago. I can’t help myself. It is my reason for being. It is why God put me here. This is my gift. I don’t feel that he led me to go door-to-door to witness. I don’t feel that he led me to be a Sunday school teacher and teach children about God. I DO feel as though he gave me a healthy body and healthy mind so that I was able to give the gift of life to deserving parents. What qualifies them as deserving parents? This is where it becomes EXTREMELY hard. The first couple I met through an agency. Both parents were doctors. I was VERY young (20), and very naive. Knowing they both had excellent jobs, I figured they would be good. At least the baby would end up successful (or at least a good chance). They transferred two embryo and both took. I gave birth to a twin boy, and twin girl in October of 2001. I get pictures once a year of the happy family of four. I feel they were a wonderful choice. My second surrogacy was a little different. The Blond BFF came to me one day and said I have a couple for your next surrogacy. She worked with the Dad and told me what a wonderful man he was. She explained that the mom wasn’t able to carry because of her heart. I agreed to meet them. This surrogacy fell in my lap. I wasn’t really in deep search, but if they were brought to me, who am I to say no? I met this wonderful couple and immediately knew they would be wonderful parents. These two parents were SO excited, that they came to EVERY appointment. Another set of twins, this time girls. There was no doubt at any point that these two baby girls weren’t going to be lucky. This one was a little tougher. It took three times. The third time, they asked me if it would be okay if their pastor came and prayed with us before the transfer. At this point, I was up for any extra help...or a direct line to the Big Guy. We gathered together, shortly after deciding to transfer three embryo instead of two, held hands and prayed. It was me, the mom and dad, the pastor, and Blond BFF (who made it all happen). I felt different that round. I knew that the struggles from the two previous tries, had been redirected to the Right Place. I felt refocused and positive. It worked. I gave birth to these two sweet angels on June 21, 2010. The birth couldn’t have gone better. The mom was able to be in the room. She stood at my feet as my mother held one leg, and Blond BFF held the other. I pushed with all my might. The only person I was interested in seeing? That momma. As the first baby girl came out, I watched her anxious mother grab her own face in utter amazement and joy. THAT is why I do what I do. That is a look that a person doesn’t forget. That momma stood there and was the first person to lay eyes on and fall in love with that sweet baby. Nothing feels better than to see wonderful people have what they have always wanted. THAT is what I call SIMPLE.
That surrogacy went so great, I knew my time was running out on my age, and knew if I wanted to do it again, I had to be quick. I created an email address, and posted an ad to a surrogacy classified website. I created a new email because I KNEW I would be bombarded with tons of emails. And I was. At least 50 in the first week. This is where it gets really hard. In these emails they tell me how long they have been trying, and why they can’t carry on their own. Each story is heartbreaking. How do you choose? This is where I start praying. I knew God would find me the right couple. In the meantime it was my job to weed through them. I didn’t want to do it for a couple that wasn’t from (or born in) the United States because I didn’t want language to be a barrier in any way. I also didn’t want to do it for someone that already had two or more kids. No need to be greedy. So after this, I get it narrowed down to two couples. Then I get this email from a woman that just...I don’t know...reached me. I felt an instant connection. This is just something you know. I knew that this would be the next couple. The first time it worked. I am actually pregnant with ONE baby this time. Imagine that! I don’t even know what it is like to give birth to one baby, it’s been so long! The mom and dad are so excited!! I am just under 12 weeks along. My due date will be January 7th...we will see. I have yet to have a baby that wasn’t born early.
There. I spilled the beans. Barefoot and pregnant.
Love it, keep it up. It keeps me entertained. Rg
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